After her test, Lisa lost her L-plates in a way she didn’t expect.
My boyfriend George dumped me two weeks before my driving test. Bad enough, but then I couldn’t use his car to take the test in. Dad knew somebody with the same make of car, and asked him if I could borrow it for the test. So this friend of Dad’s dropped it off at their house and I took my test, passed, and drove back to Mum and Dad’s, shaky and chuffed to bits. And that should have been the end of it.
Thing is, Mum and Dad had gone out shopping, leaving this note saying, ‘Please hang on till Dave gets there, so you can give his keys back.’ It was Dave’s car I’d borrowed. So when he turned up and rang the doorbell, I was expecting some old geezer in a cardigan. But I opened the door and he looked just like Brad Pitt. And he knew it; he did that whole look-up-and-down thing with a half smile, like he really understood what I was thinking. I said something half-witted and dropped the bloody keys on the mat. I bent to grab them and as I straightened up he put his hand out, like he was going to steady me, and put it straight on my left breast! Which was the moment for him to apologise – but he just grinned at me. And half of me was thinking, There’s no way you’re as old as my dad,’ and the other half thought, ‘this would burn George to a crisp, if he heard’.
The next thing I knew, I had my hands on his waistband (he wasn’t wearing elasticated jeans, thank God) and he was shoving me back down the hall until I hit the stairs. I kissed him and he tasted really, really nice, and that was it, I never stood a chance once he placed his thigh between my legs – I was snogging and wriggling around on him like a pole dancer. I didn’t even notice when he slipped his hands round my back and deftly undid my bra. I suppose an older man has a lot more experience, a smoother action, that kind of thing. But once he’d lowered his head to my nipples and was tonguing away I realised that this was going to go the distance, so I pushed him away a bit and lay down on the hall carpet, hitching up my best skirt, which I’d worn to impress the examiner. When he went down on me, he really went for it, like he was famished. With the adrenaline of passing the test and the fear of Mum and Dad turning up any second, I came like an express train.
I thought that was going to be the end of it, but I sat up and he was still grinning and sliding on a condom. I was blushing away like a red light, so I reached forward and put my hand in his hair (which did have quite a lot of grey in it, I noticed), and pulled him down on top of me. When he slid inside me something clicked and thought to myself, ‘I’m screwing my dad’s mate in my parents’ hall at eleven o’clock on a Friday morning’ so it wasn’t the most exciting sex in the world..
He came and then we straightened ourselves up and that was it. By the time Mum and Dad got back, I was sitting in the kitchen with a cup of tea. Ever since though, I can’t stop thinking about what we did. Every time I pass a bloke with fair greying hair, I feel myself getting hot. And I never go round to Mum and Dad’s until I’m absolutely sure there’s no chance of bumping into Dave because I don’t trust myself around him, I really don’t.
